Trust your hopes, Not your fears

Friday, March 21, 2014.

Its been quite sometime since my last entry. Sorry, Ive just been too busy. Indeed, its one of the most challenging year for me. 

All that is in my mind now is to get over with my finals though Im not prepared at all. Im just getting tired with studies. I kinda want to start off with smtg new. A new environment, experience, a new phase to be precise. Sch this year has just been too stressful. I do get some nervous breakdown moments at times, just too fear that I might not do well and wont be graduating. I tend to overthink too much about my future lately, negative thoughts. And its really not doing good at all for me. 

My family by farmost, has been so supportive, never fails to motivate me whenever I feel like giving up. Cz I reach to a point, where at times, I kinda lose interest towards studies. I know, I shouldnt be in that way. Its my last stretch, I should work harder. 

I finally managed to resolve this, which is by frequently reciting the al-quran. I try as much as possible to recite it 5 times a day, after each prayer. And yes, eversince then, I feel much much better. It totally help to ease my mind. I feel so much peaceful and alhamdulilah, somehow Allah has help to ease my learning process. Revising sch work is no longer a pain. Im much much confident and back on track, striving to do the best. And also, Ive been regularly doing my late night prayers, and Alhamdulilah I could sense that it has help me in a way. Indeed, al-quran and prayers are the best remedy to almost everything. Thank you Allah (: 

So for now, Im just pack with revisions till finals hit me 6th May till 20th May. InsyaAllah, I'll do my best. Im doing this not only for my parents but for myself. And in the meantime, I shall not let any negativity sneaking in my way. Stay positive, I know I can do this. 

On a side note, Ive turned 23 today (: And happy 50th bday mum! Yup we share the same bday. How cool is that? Hehe. Till then, xoxo 

Blogged @ 7:10 PM

Sunday, December 29, 2013.

Dear heart, tell me what are the exact ways to heal this broken heart?
Dear mind, tell me how can I get rid those memories off my mind? 
Dearself, tell me how much stronger I need to be to finally get over this?
Dear feelings, tell me the ways to refrain myself from having these continuous pain? 
Ya Allah, please give me all the strength that I need. Guide my feelings to sincerely forgive those who have terribly hurt me. Help me Ya Allah, to forgo all these. 

Its been years. Seeing at how strong Ive been, I thought Ive fully healed. But perhaps I was wrong. There's just something that could still break down those walls Ive built, and in just seconds, Im shattered. And emotions, its just one of the hardest to deal with. 

How does one actually, completely moves on? Remove them from your newsfeed? Delete all their photos? Remove them from your contact list? Keep yourself busy? Get to know a new person? Distant yourself from them? Get away from anything related to them? 
Yes, its all in my checklist. Done that.
But why does that someone still lingers on your mind? How do you stop remembering that someone? Its really easier said than done. 

Why, the random thoughts of maybe in few yrs time, they'll probably get engaged or married, breaks you down? How are you going to get urself prepared to this news? You shouldnt be in tears, you know that. 

Why does seeing that someone or his family members on teevee, always gives you a sudden heartache? How much longer are you going to skip teevee programmes that involves them, just not wanting to be remembered of the past? Fear that it will causes you to breakdown. 

Why cant you just let go of your love, accept someone that does love you, and be genuinuely happy for that particular someone that has broken your heart?  
You do know, feelings cant be forced. And it all goes back to fate, the Creator. 

Please my dear heart, you really got to heal. Its no one's fault, really. Its just not meant to be, and everything happens for a reason. Have faith, cause Allah knows best. 

Ya Allah, please help me go through these with a light heart. Sesungguhnya, jodoh itu rahsia mu ya Allah.. 

Blogged @ 9:10 PM

Friday, December 27, 2013.

The moment when u realised 2013 is ending in just few more days. WOW, seriously? Well my dear time, you surely did fly pretty fast this year. I could barely feel december and its like going off so soon? Haha. Indeed, it has been a tough year for me but neverthless, there are plenty of joyous moments that is more worth to be remembered (: 
Just like every year, I gathered my strength, to be the best in everything I could. And whatever thats not been achieved, it shall be carried forward to the new year's resolution, As every failures is always the first step towards achieving your goals. So with that in mind, lets just conclude my 2014 goals : 

1) Finish up my driving license. 
Ohh yesss, I really need to. Im like turning 23 in this coming march and my parents has been super naggy towards this issue. Okay mum, no worries, I'll get this done asap *peace*

2) Degree cert.
As you all know, its my final year in uni. So I really hope I'll clear all my papers and graduate with a good degree cert (: 

3) Business.
Im currently starting back with my online business. So hopefully this time round, it'll be more successful.  I just gotta work hard for this, since its always in my dream list to be a successful entrepenuer. 

4) Sign up for hairstlying, facial/spa, baking course/classes.
Well theres no harm picking up some extra skills, cz you might never know when u need it ;)

5) Job.
InsyaAllah, with good grades, I might be able to get a good job (: 

6) Love life. Mr Right 
Well, certainly the Creator knows best. Have faith :) 

7) Be a better person.
Lets "kill" those bad behaviours, habits. 

8) Umrah 
InsyaAllah, hopefully (: 

May 2014 be a better year for all of us and lets work hard, achieve more than what we have aim. InsyaAllah. 

Goodluck for 2014 darlings, xx

Blogged @ 10:32 PM

Sunday, November 3, 2013.

On saturday, 2nd Nov 2013, me and my friends arrived at SARANG CAFE at 2.15pm to try out their food, due to the great review. However I was utterly disappointed with the service. We ordered 4 main dish at 2.30pm and the last dish came at 3.45pm. They actually forgotten the order until we approached. The shop was not even crowded, gosh! Even so, we still tolerated and accept their apologies.

Done eating, we asked for the bill from one of the workers. We waited for 15 minutes but no one came. We then approached another worker, they acknowledge but still, no action was taken. In the end, we walked in to the cashier counter, and make the payment. I have a 10% discount card but the cashier said it cant be used, only till her colleague said the card can be use, she said it was too late and cant be voided. When the fact is, the one that shes issuing to us, was the 2nd receipt as she forgotten to include one of our orders in the 1st receipt. Still at this point, we did not pass any bad remarks to them, we kept quite although we were already pissed off. 

The moment we left the cafe, the cashier approached us and said "Its okay, we're not charging for the hot drink" while dumping the money ($1.40 coins) on the table. The thing is, we didnt even ordered any hot drinks that she claims, and if we were to compare with the 10% discount that should be offset it was $7.50. Apart from that RUDE gesture, we even said thank you. And to our surprise, she then said behind our back saying we are giving attitude??!! 

Its good enough we tolerated the delays you gave us, we didnt even raise our voice, question you back or make any SINGLE NOISE or creating unpleasant scene at the cafe. Not even demanding for any complimentary. We just kept quiet and yet YOU as a worker cant even tolerate our (YOUR CUSTOMERS) damn pissed off face? And apart from saying we are giving attitudes, you even said kite orang kurang ajar behind our back?! What is this??? Seriously, so RUDE. Such a bad customer service. 

I really hope in future, they'll improve on their customer service and not recruiting RUDE workers. 

Nonetheless, the food was great, its just the service that pissed us off. Afterall, service is what makes a good cafe, and worth coming back. 

Here's a snapshot on what we ate. I had grilled cajun dory and it was really nice. So give it a try! (:


Blogged @ 5:29 PM

Monday, September 16, 2013.

As the title says so, Im finally back to sch. InsyaAllah, if everything goes well, this will be my final yr in sch (: And for the record, this is the only year that Ive no one, that's in the same class as me. None of my friends managed to get the same slot :( 

All this while, Ive been lucky to have atleast a friend for my every module. Its actually not that bad being alone in class, I mean Ive ever lunch alone during my lunch periods. Its just that, having a friend in the same class, it somehow 'brightens' my day, mood during lesson (: 

But Alhamdulilah, I managed to make a new friend in class today. A very nice chinese girl (: Im no longer a loner now, hahaha. Well atleast for this module >.<

You know bloggy, as Im walking around in sch today, hmm.. well.. okay, who am I lying to? Its just different this year. Being in sch where I could no longer bump into someone that I love. That charming face.. Yes I know our story are pretty much done since yrs back. But this feelings, they just wouldnt stop loving you and Ive no clue to that. Ive missed you today. Ive miss your presence. I know Ive got to move on. I guess, I just happened to remember you alot today. It'll all get better, move on. :') 

Blogged @ 1:07 PM

Saturday, September 7, 2013.

Have u ever been in a situation, where you manage to control your tears from flowing, when the fact is, you're deeply hurt. You gathered all your strength and it overpowers your emotions, and soon you realise you're no longer affected by his acts. I guess its true, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. What doesn't kill you makes a fighter :') 

Blogged @ 8:59 PM

Sunday, September 1, 2013.

Hey september, we meet again! Please be a lovely month alright ;)

Ive just read some updates in my sch portal, and guess what? Sch will resume on 16 september onwards. Hahaha. Cheers to my final year in sch, InsyaAllah. 

Im sure its gona be a hectic year for me with all these tough upcoming modules. But what keep me positive is I repetitively told myself, I could do this. And since my results alhamdulilah, gets better each and ever year, that shows, Ive been studying the right way and that Ive managed to cope with it. Its all about staying positive, work hard and be discipline. I agree every modules is tough in its way, but the key is to study hard and always, remember Allah. May the Creator ease our journey and help us in every way. InsyaAllah, I'll do my best (: 

And today Im so glad I managed to talk on the phone with my friend whos in Australia now. Its always nice to talk to him, such a wonderful buddy. A friend that never fails to cheer me up, and never tires to spread me with positive advices. May one day we meet up again, though I know its prolly 5 yrs later :') No matter what, we'll always stay in touch alright. Miss you buddy! 

Till my next post readers, xx. 

Blogged @ 9:47 PM